You know the world's a troubled place when even the most mellow musicians are writing politically-inspired songs.
A reference to Jack Johnson and his latest album, Sleep Through The Static
Friday, October 31, 2008
Thursday, October 30, 2008
tomorrow's forecast
I check the Bureau of Meteorology's website on a regular basis now, because they seem to be doing an alright job at predicting the weather, and I never know what's in store the next day unless I check their forecast.
Tomorrow is predicted to be 36 degrees Celsius, and their summary description was
"Hot.*"
I had to laugh :)
(*They also wrote "Chance late shower/storm" afterwards, but the first comment sounded so Captain Obvious-like when I read it!)
P.S. They also have a cool section on Indigenous weather forecasting, which I only noticed today. Haven't had a proper chance to look at it yet, but sounds like it's a new project they're working on. Interesting stuff!
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
Floetry - If I Was A Bird
(Spoken) Sometimes blindness finds me
and leads me through ignorance
not allowing us to gain experience
so we become lifeless
At other times I cover with
self pity or walk aimlessly through reality so
Occasionally I choose to travel alone
but never fulfil my possibility so
mostly I attempt to achieve balance
by seeking right knowledge of loving
and reviewing and eventually overstanding those
many lessons of my life
You got me caught in a stormy eye world of dreams
And I beg to see truth and promises you've made to me
Now we’ve come so far but my visions of happiness
With you in my life I’m afraid and confused
If I was a bird I’d fly
If I was a bird I’d fly away
Spread my wings so I’d escape
If I was the sky
I’d let it rain to wash away the pain
If I was a bird I’d fly away
Spread my wings so I’d escape
If I was the sky
I’d let it rain to wash away the pain
Now why do I feel so alone
Knowing I know I have you
And what made you turn around on me
What did I do
And when did love feel this way
So much pain and misery
Where’s the you I once knew
And could ya fly with me
If I was a bird I’d fly away
Spread my wings so I’d escape
If I was the sky
I’d let it rain to wash away the pain
If I was a bird I’d fly away
Spread my wings so I’d escape
If I was the sky
I’d let it rain to wash away the pain
Now I can’t stay
You won’t need me
Set me free and let me fly
Oh fly with me
Fly with me me
Fly with me yeah
Fly oh fly fly
If I was a bird I’d fly away
Spread my wings so I’d escape
If I was the sky
I’d let it rain to wash away the pain
If I was a bird I’d fly away
Spread my wings so I’d escape
If I was the sky
I’d let it rain to wash away the pain
Fly away
If I was the sky
I’d let it rain to wash the pain
Fly away
and leads me through ignorance
not allowing us to gain experience
so we become lifeless
At other times I cover with
self pity or walk aimlessly through reality so
Occasionally I choose to travel alone
but never fulfil my possibility so
mostly I attempt to achieve balance
by seeking right knowledge of loving
and reviewing and eventually overstanding those
many lessons of my life
You got me caught in a stormy eye world of dreams
And I beg to see truth and promises you've made to me
Now we’ve come so far but my visions of happiness
With you in my life I’m afraid and confused
If I was a bird I’d fly
If I was a bird I’d fly away
Spread my wings so I’d escape
If I was the sky
I’d let it rain to wash away the pain
If I was a bird I’d fly away
Spread my wings so I’d escape
If I was the sky
I’d let it rain to wash away the pain
Now why do I feel so alone
Knowing I know I have you
And what made you turn around on me
What did I do
And when did love feel this way
So much pain and misery
Where’s the you I once knew
And could ya fly with me
If I was a bird I’d fly away
Spread my wings so I’d escape
If I was the sky
I’d let it rain to wash away the pain
If I was a bird I’d fly away
Spread my wings so I’d escape
If I was the sky
I’d let it rain to wash away the pain
Now I can’t stay
You won’t need me
Set me free and let me fly
Oh fly with me
Fly with me me
Fly with me yeah
Fly oh fly fly
If I was a bird I’d fly away
Spread my wings so I’d escape
If I was the sky
I’d let it rain to wash away the pain
If I was a bird I’d fly away
Spread my wings so I’d escape
If I was the sky
I’d let it rain to wash away the pain
Fly away
If I was the sky
I’d let it rain to wash the pain
Fly away
Monday, October 27, 2008
love does not keep a record of wrongs
Trying to surprise somebody and make them happy is extremely difficult with a smile on your face when all they seem to do is upset you at every turn before you present them with your surprise. I wanted so dearly to make him happy, and I think I managed it in the end, but even now the tears well to my eyes because there were so many moments leading up to the surprise where I felt like I was trying to fight a current of upsetting feelings, because he was abrupt at times and/or grumpy at times from lack of sleep/hot weather/traffic/etc.. Again, maybe I need to just relax some more and not take everything so personally. But sometimes I wish he was more aware of what he's doing and/or how's he communicating.
The fact that I've written all of the above is a bit ironic, given the title of this post. But I needed to get it off my chest somehow. My morning didn't start well - I slipped over while stepping out of the shower (and now there's a nice bruise on my leg, no serious injuries thankfully), and I had a bad start to my driving test (and felt like I made a ridiculous number of mistakes) which apparently didn't affect my score that much - I passed and received my red P's which was a huge relief as I was very certain I'd failed. So emotions were riding high, I couldn't get through to him because of bad phone reception, and when I did I felt bad because he was so tired he couldn't even talk. In another phone conversation later that afternoon I asked a small favour and he got pretty exasperated over the phone, which was the kicker. I felt pretty crap after that, but forgot about it in the hope that things would be better when we met up.
Little things bother me, but only because there seems to be lots of little things all at once, which accumulate and push me to tears. I still believe I only cry out of frustration.. or empathy for somebody else (usually a Disney character of some sort), and even then that's only because they attach emotional music to the important scene!
Anyways - the summary? Lots of things bothered me today, but I don't care, because I genuinely surprised him and made him happy, and that in itself makes me feel peaceful. Love does not keep a record of wrongs, and I intend to make it that way.
The fact that I've written all of the above is a bit ironic, given the title of this post. But I needed to get it off my chest somehow. My morning didn't start well - I slipped over while stepping out of the shower (and now there's a nice bruise on my leg, no serious injuries thankfully), and I had a bad start to my driving test (and felt like I made a ridiculous number of mistakes) which apparently didn't affect my score that much - I passed and received my red P's which was a huge relief as I was very certain I'd failed. So emotions were riding high, I couldn't get through to him because of bad phone reception, and when I did I felt bad because he was so tired he couldn't even talk. In another phone conversation later that afternoon I asked a small favour and he got pretty exasperated over the phone, which was the kicker. I felt pretty crap after that, but forgot about it in the hope that things would be better when we met up.
Little things bother me, but only because there seems to be lots of little things all at once, which accumulate and push me to tears. I still believe I only cry out of frustration.. or empathy for somebody else (usually a Disney character of some sort), and even then that's only because they attach emotional music to the important scene!
Anyways - the summary? Lots of things bothered me today, but I don't care, because I genuinely surprised him and made him happy, and that in itself makes me feel peaceful. Love does not keep a record of wrongs, and I intend to make it that way.
Saturday, October 25, 2008
if love is akin to mental illness..
..then I am a complete maniac.
I want to be able to tell him every day that I love him, without destroying the impact behind those three words that are so difficult to utter together. I don't want to waste a single moment; he's who I live for and who I would die for. And the worst part is, I don't know if he'll ever understand the depth of emotion I feel. Maybe I'm wrong; maybe what I'm searching for is a woman's compassion and understanding, and trying to receive that from a man would be a near impossible task it seems. All I want is to find a way to show him what I feel, so that he thinks to himself "Wow, she really loves me." I want to live my life with the knowledge that he understands why I do the things I do. It's because I'm so in love.
I want to be able to tell him every day that I love him, without destroying the impact behind those three words that are so difficult to utter together. I don't want to waste a single moment; he's who I live for and who I would die for. And the worst part is, I don't know if he'll ever understand the depth of emotion I feel. Maybe I'm wrong; maybe what I'm searching for is a woman's compassion and understanding, and trying to receive that from a man would be a near impossible task it seems. All I want is to find a way to show him what I feel, so that he thinks to himself "Wow, she really loves me." I want to live my life with the knowledge that he understands why I do the things I do. It's because I'm so in love.
there must be too many words in the English language
What kind of a word is "limn"?!
It's like they ran out of letter combinations!
I mean, I appreciate the history of the word, ie. its roots, but its form as of today is a bit too random for my liking..
It's like they ran out of letter combinations!
I mean, I appreciate the history of the word, ie. its roots, but its form as of today is a bit too random for my liking..
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
tidy inbox = clear mind
There's something really satisfying about going through your email and/or phone inbox and deleting old emails/messages. Every now and again I will purge all messages from my phone, both sent and received. I usually do it when I want to rid myself of whatever emotions I'm feeling at the time, and I feel refreshed/can start anew.
Right now, I'm making an effort to get rid of all the shit in my email. I consolidated my two gmail accounts many weeks ago, and now I am going through and doing the occasional clean up.
Yes it's a form of procrastination, but it's also an effort to keep all my correspondence organised so I know where everything is. An email account is just like having a stack of letters on your desk - you should get rid of all the crap you no longer need, because it's a waste of space.. the only difference is that people generally don't feel the need to clean up their emails because it's online and not actually taking up any physical space. And with email accounts having more space nowadays, there's hardly any chance that you'll run out of megabytes, so again there's less motivation for a clean-up.
Edit (10.22pm): I'm also unsubscribing from websites (et al) that I don't use or haven't used for a long time. It's easy to just delete the emails that occasionally grace your inbox, but I'd prefer to remove my personal details from random websites instead. I mean, you wouldn't randomly leave your phone number and address lying around on the ground in real life, so why would you do that to yourself on the World Wide Web?
Right now, I'm making an effort to get rid of all the shit in my email. I consolidated my two gmail accounts many weeks ago, and now I am going through and doing the occasional clean up.
Yes it's a form of procrastination, but it's also an effort to keep all my correspondence organised so I know where everything is. An email account is just like having a stack of letters on your desk - you should get rid of all the crap you no longer need, because it's a waste of space.. the only difference is that people generally don't feel the need to clean up their emails because it's online and not actually taking up any physical space. And with email accounts having more space nowadays, there's hardly any chance that you'll run out of megabytes, so again there's less motivation for a clean-up.
Edit (10.22pm): I'm also unsubscribing from websites (et al) that I don't use or haven't used for a long time. It's easy to just delete the emails that occasionally grace your inbox, but I'd prefer to remove my personal details from random websites instead. I mean, you wouldn't randomly leave your phone number and address lying around on the ground in real life, so why would you do that to yourself on the World Wide Web?
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
Quote - Thomas A. Edison
"What you are will show in what you do."
Definitely true, and definitely something to think about. Because I have a lot of improving to do.
Definitely true, and definitely something to think about. Because I have a lot of improving to do.
Monday, October 20, 2008
Quotes - James A. Baldwin
I picked up the following quotes from souledonmusic.blogspot.com, a blog that I have recently started following. Highly recommended if you're into old-school soul music and hip-hop/rap etc.. this dude picks some amazing tunes for the reader's listening pleasure!
"Life is tragic simply because the earth turns and the sun inexorably rises and sets, and one day, for each of us, the sun will go down for the last, last time."
It's a scary thought. But I guess each of us has to accept that we will not live on this planet forever. I don't know if there's another life after this one, or whether we transcend to another world, another planet, or another realm that is beyond human comprehension. Who knows. Maybe our spirits disperse and become absorbed by other spirits, whether it be fauna or flora.
"Love takes off masks that we fear we cannot live without and know we cannot live within."
Perhaps it does. In any case, my better half knows so much about me, more than I would have ever thought, but I wouldn't want it any other way. I truly believe that honesty and openness is the way to go, even that means having to make the occasional confession. Love is great (I'm such a Romantic), and it really does make you do some crazy things (love is not dissimilar to mental illness.. check it).
"No one can possibly know what is about to happen: it is happening, each time, for the first time, for the only time."
Guess this could be a light or dark quote, depending on your own interpretation. Take each moment as it comes, I suppose!
"You know, it's not the world that was my oppressor, because what the world does to you, if the world does it to you long enough and effectively enough, you begin to do to yourself."
A bit of a dark quote, isn't it? Feels a bit 1984-esque. Still contemplating the words.
"Life is tragic simply because the earth turns and the sun inexorably rises and sets, and one day, for each of us, the sun will go down for the last, last time."
It's a scary thought. But I guess each of us has to accept that we will not live on this planet forever. I don't know if there's another life after this one, or whether we transcend to another world, another planet, or another realm that is beyond human comprehension. Who knows. Maybe our spirits disperse and become absorbed by other spirits, whether it be fauna or flora.
"Love takes off masks that we fear we cannot live without and know we cannot live within."
Perhaps it does. In any case, my better half knows so much about me, more than I would have ever thought, but I wouldn't want it any other way. I truly believe that honesty and openness is the way to go, even that means having to make the occasional confession. Love is great (I'm such a Romantic), and it really does make you do some crazy things (love is not dissimilar to mental illness.. check it).
"No one can possibly know what is about to happen: it is happening, each time, for the first time, for the only time."
Guess this could be a light or dark quote, depending on your own interpretation. Take each moment as it comes, I suppose!
"You know, it's not the world that was my oppressor, because what the world does to you, if the world does it to you long enough and effectively enough, you begin to do to yourself."
A bit of a dark quote, isn't it? Feels a bit 1984-esque. Still contemplating the words.
Sunday, October 19, 2008
a nice way to end the weekend
Briefly went to see Sculptures by the Sea (SxS) this evening, just before sundown. Didn't see much but I don't think there was much to see, to be honest. I still maintain that the best year was 2005, the year that I first visited SxS. Ever since then, the exhibition has diminished a little in impressiveness each year.
I convinced my boy to come with me and I was so glad we made it to Bondi. It wasn't so much the sculptures, but the walk itself that made me happy. He was exhausted and therefore not very talkative, but I was so happy just to be out there walking with him.. I think the only reason I was able to contain the level of happiness I was experiencing was that my shoes would have gone flying if I'd tried to jump around and/or run around, and that he would have been even more exhausted if not completely unresponsive to any crazy antics of mine.
I don't really know why it sometimes feels as though life is the biggest struggle when he's not beside me. But what I do know is that he does a hell of a lot for me, and I need to make sure he knows I appreciate every single moment.
I convinced my boy to come with me and I was so glad we made it to Bondi. It wasn't so much the sculptures, but the walk itself that made me happy. He was exhausted and therefore not very talkative, but I was so happy just to be out there walking with him.. I think the only reason I was able to contain the level of happiness I was experiencing was that my shoes would have gone flying if I'd tried to jump around and/or run around, and that he would have been even more exhausted if not completely unresponsive to any crazy antics of mine.
I don't really know why it sometimes feels as though life is the biggest struggle when he's not beside me. But what I do know is that he does a hell of a lot for me, and I need to make sure he knows I appreciate every single moment.
Saturday, October 18, 2008
out of this foc-ing world
Currently listening to Rodrigo y Gabriela's album Re-Foc on shuffle.
This is the first time I'm listening to the album, and the first track I heard was Track 6 - Paris.
Blew me away.
The next track which is the one I'm currently listening to is Track 7 - Take 5 (Foc-ing version 9).
Incredible stuff.
Rodrigo y Gabriela is an amazing pair of guitarists. Let's hope they never end their relationship and therefore their musical genius!
This is the first time I'm listening to the album, and the first track I heard was Track 6 - Paris.
Blew me away.
The next track which is the one I'm currently listening to is Track 7 - Take 5 (Foc-ing version 9).
Incredible stuff.
Rodrigo y Gabriela is an amazing pair of guitarists. Let's hope they never end their relationship and therefore their musical genius!
Thursday, October 16, 2008
Quote - Nikki Giovanni
"It is wrong to think that love comes from long companionship and persevering courtship. Love is the offspring of spiritual affinity and unless that affinity is created in a moment, it will not be created for years or even generations."
It's an interesting thought. And maybe there's some truth to it.
I have a habit of making a decision on whether or not I like somebody based on the 'vibe' they emanate during the first (or first few) meetings. Sometimes I'm wrong, but manytimes I'm right. Thinking about the relationship I'm in, and how I picked him all those years ago, in an almost prophetic motion.. it makes you wonder..
It's an interesting thought. And maybe there's some truth to it.
I have a habit of making a decision on whether or not I like somebody based on the 'vibe' they emanate during the first (or first few) meetings. Sometimes I'm wrong, but manytimes I'm right. Thinking about the relationship I'm in, and how I picked him all those years ago, in an almost prophetic motion.. it makes you wonder..
from ribs to raps
Last night I went out to Ribs & Rumps for dinner with Lan, one of his best friends and her boyfriend, and some of my school friends and their friends/relations. The food was great - unexpectedly so - I ordered lamb ribs and they were very tasty! I thought Lan had ordered a mixed grill, but a breakdown in communications meant that he thought I'd ordered for him, while I thought he'd ordered for himself.. and so there were only 7 meals for a table of 8. I initially felt guilty but that was shadowed by overwhelming embarrassment.. but all's well that ends well, because Ming was able to share his mixed grill and thankfully nobody went hungry. There was definitely a lot of food on the table, so I'm sure everybody left feeling satisfied to say the least!
I wasn't feeling well, so I chose to take a raincheck on the ice cream trip and went home instead. I had a great conversation in the car about the culture and history behind hip-hop and rap music - for instance, did you know that Puff Daddy (a.k.a. P. Diddy) created the modern-day remix? I had no idea! Respect! - it was so enlightening, and made me re-appreciate the music style(s). I learnt about beats and where they come from (in terms of US location), and a bit about the timeline of rap and key artists of the genre, and who represents the East or West-side of the game. Etc.
It was such a great conversation! I love nothing more than a deep, refreshing conversation about music. That really topped off my evening. :)
I wasn't feeling well, so I chose to take a raincheck on the ice cream trip and went home instead. I had a great conversation in the car about the culture and history behind hip-hop and rap music - for instance, did you know that Puff Daddy (a.k.a. P. Diddy) created the modern-day remix? I had no idea! Respect! - it was so enlightening, and made me re-appreciate the music style(s). I learnt about beats and where they come from (in terms of US location), and a bit about the timeline of rap and key artists of the genre, and who represents the East or West-side of the game. Etc.
It was such a great conversation! I love nothing more than a deep, refreshing conversation about music. That really topped off my evening. :)
normality. it's great!
Lately - meaning, the past week or so - I've been having a great time in my relationship. But what makes it especially blogworthy for me is that I feel like I've been more relaxed about it all. Less worrying, less sulking, less unrealistic expectations, less jealousy.. it is such a refreshing feeling! It's like all of a sudden I've grown up just that little bit more, and I'm getting more out of the relationship because of it (meaning that feeling even better about it than I was before).
For the last month or more, I've been making a real effort to make sure I'm a better listener, making mental notes in my head about what he likes, what he's just updated me on.. and again I feel much better for it, and gone are the days where I ask myself "What am I going to get him?" for whatever special event it is that is usually commemorated with a gift. Instead, I feel like I've got too many choices - or rather, items keep springing out at me when I'm browsing stores, and I have to remind myself that if I buy all these items at once, I won't actually end up saving them for an occasion, I'll end up giving them to him on a random evening and then I'll be at a loss for gift ideas.
It's nice to have life smiling down on me like this. It doesn't happen often enough sometimes.
For the last month or more, I've been making a real effort to make sure I'm a better listener, making mental notes in my head about what he likes, what he's just updated me on.. and again I feel much better for it, and gone are the days where I ask myself "What am I going to get him?" for whatever special event it is that is usually commemorated with a gift. Instead, I feel like I've got too many choices - or rather, items keep springing out at me when I'm browsing stores, and I have to remind myself that if I buy all these items at once, I won't actually end up saving them for an occasion, I'll end up giving them to him on a random evening and then I'll be at a loss for gift ideas.
It's nice to have life smiling down on me like this. It doesn't happen often enough sometimes.
Friday, October 10, 2008
catching up..
..on podcasts. Hamish and Andy's segments from during the Beijing Games are hilarious!
Saturday, October 4, 2008
what a week!
And it's not over yet (unless you're one of those people who believe Sunday is the first day of the week. Imagine if the actual first day of the week was like, Friday. That would mess with people's minds.)!
I'm so very tired - tomorrow will be no exception - but there's so much to write about. I'll just mention what I've been up to.
Went to the gym on Tuesday. Went to uni on Tuesday and Wednesday (during uni HOLIDAYS! Can't they just give us less work). Lan & I visited Taronga Zoo on Thursday, which was lots of fun! Would love to go again :) And last night I attended Dani & Zhi Wen's joint 21st, which was also lots of fun.
It feels like I've been going non-stop all week.. managed to sleep in until midday today which was much-needed. But I have to be up by 6.30am tomorrow so I think I'll take an early night tonight as well.. golf at 7.40am.. what a struggle..
I'm so very tired - tomorrow will be no exception - but there's so much to write about. I'll just mention what I've been up to.
Went to the gym on Tuesday. Went to uni on Tuesday and Wednesday (during uni HOLIDAYS! Can't they just give us less work). Lan & I visited Taronga Zoo on Thursday, which was lots of fun! Would love to go again :) And last night I attended Dani & Zhi Wen's joint 21st, which was also lots of fun.
It feels like I've been going non-stop all week.. managed to sleep in until midday today which was much-needed. But I have to be up by 6.30am tomorrow so I think I'll take an early night tonight as well.. golf at 7.40am.. what a struggle..
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