patience is a virtue.. albeit a difficult one

Every time I feel like asking for something from him because I feel like I'm the one who's been trying hard, I stop myself. All the things I've done lately are because I love and care, and not because I want something in return. So I'm just going to keep my mouth shut and be happy in the knowledge that I'm doing good things.

And I wish my heart would stop big-beating and just be normal-beating.. it's bothersome and it scares me sometimes. According to Lan it's a sinus rhythm and it happens when pressure builds up in the heart so it tries to solve the problem by making an 'escape beat', ie. a big beat to try and release the pressure. I just think my heart aches in a romantic fashion.. and obviously he has to do something about that! :P