Saturday, November 3, 2007
it's time, once again..
..to save me from myself.
Sometimes I get stuck.
I want to send you a message telling you just how much you're annoying me, or that I hate you, or that I just don't think I'm right for you.
Then I think, no, I don't want to waste a text on that, so then I think about sending you an email. But then I want you to read the email before you call me, but that doesn't work if you're not going to be at home when you call, so I can't do that either. At which point I flick back to the text. Then the email. And so on, and so forth, to the point where I just get so angry that I want to throw something against the wall, and I just can't get anything done, least of all study, because I need to resolve this inner conflict that I have with you.
But you've been through such a rough patch lately, I don't want to tell you how much you're making me dislike you right now.
I don't believe you anymore when you say you'll try to change your ways. Because you "try" for a few hours and the next time I see you, we've forgotten about it. But it's like that proverbial stone. You think it's all going well, when really that stone's just sitting there gathering that dirty moss that eventually gets scrubbed off with a lot of badmouthing and anger and hate.
At this point I would ask, why do you make me do this, but I don't really see how I can point the finger at you entirely (and yet it would be so easy to do that), because it's not as though you're deliberately trying to get on my nerves. But damn, you're really good at it sometimes.
I swear that since you've entered my life, I've had more mood swings than ever before. Especially towards you.
You wonder why we've been to the edge and back so many times. I think it's because I know that in the long run, something's going to give, and I'm going to find the right person, and you're going to find the right person, and then it will be game over, thanks for playing.
---
Man, I'm so bad with personal relationships. Friendships are so much easier. Love is a drug, once taken, forever addicted. You end up in a spiral of "serious" relationships, multiple rebounds, and if you lose, you come out of the game feeling much older and more empty than ever. There's a lot to be gained in love, but there's a lot to be lost as well. The platonic love of friendship, or that exciting period of "hope" where there's a chemistry between friends, but neither will act before the other, I think that's where you can derive the most fun.
---
Sooner or later I'll brighten up.
----------------
Now playing: Chris Hawkes - Falling Into Doubt
Sometimes I get stuck.
I want to send you a message telling you just how much you're annoying me, or that I hate you, or that I just don't think I'm right for you.
Then I think, no, I don't want to waste a text on that, so then I think about sending you an email. But then I want you to read the email before you call me, but that doesn't work if you're not going to be at home when you call, so I can't do that either. At which point I flick back to the text. Then the email. And so on, and so forth, to the point where I just get so angry that I want to throw something against the wall, and I just can't get anything done, least of all study, because I need to resolve this inner conflict that I have with you.
But you've been through such a rough patch lately, I don't want to tell you how much you're making me dislike you right now.
I don't believe you anymore when you say you'll try to change your ways. Because you "try" for a few hours and the next time I see you, we've forgotten about it. But it's like that proverbial stone. You think it's all going well, when really that stone's just sitting there gathering that dirty moss that eventually gets scrubbed off with a lot of badmouthing and anger and hate.
At this point I would ask, why do you make me do this, but I don't really see how I can point the finger at you entirely (and yet it would be so easy to do that), because it's not as though you're deliberately trying to get on my nerves. But damn, you're really good at it sometimes.
I swear that since you've entered my life, I've had more mood swings than ever before. Especially towards you.
You wonder why we've been to the edge and back so many times. I think it's because I know that in the long run, something's going to give, and I'm going to find the right person, and you're going to find the right person, and then it will be game over, thanks for playing.
---
Man, I'm so bad with personal relationships. Friendships are so much easier. Love is a drug, once taken, forever addicted. You end up in a spiral of "serious" relationships, multiple rebounds, and if you lose, you come out of the game feeling much older and more empty than ever. There's a lot to be gained in love, but there's a lot to be lost as well. The platonic love of friendship, or that exciting period of "hope" where there's a chemistry between friends, but neither will act before the other, I think that's where you can derive the most fun.
---
Sooner or later I'll brighten up.
----------------
Now playing: Chris Hawkes - Falling Into Doubt
Friday, November 2, 2007
week 11 discussion posts #1-3
Slightly altered for the purposes of this blog
Phew! 10-12hr working days for two weeks.. has left me very far behind in tute discussions! Apologies for my ridiculously late replies.
Responding to Miroula's reponse to Ariella (;P), where she's mentioned "Perhaps being a paraplegic would lead the person to learn life lessons or become the kind of person they wouldnt have been able to become if they were able to walk."
I agree with Miroula on this. I've observed from news reports, or from reading about other people's lives/experiences, that when one part of the is damaged or is dysfunctional, another part of the brain seems to light up and become much more stronger or 'focused'.
Take for instance, the blind painter who is able to distinguish between colours simply by touching the dried pigment on the canvas (true story - Mum recently read about this dude in a Korean newspaper). His lack of eyesight appears to have heightened his sense of touch. It's as though the brain is provided with a certain amount of "skill", and depending on its influences, varying portions of "skill" are divided amongst the different functions.
To compare to something more basic, it's almost like those racing games, where you can choose to have a car with high speed but little grip, or good braking but slow acceleration.
----
In response to Alex's question "Will such a machine operate as a human brain does? Will it feel emotion, love, etc?" -
Call me stubborn but I think human emotion is possibly way too complex and unpredictable for us to break it down and "computerize" it, so to speak. Not only that, but it would make life so.. mechanic. We spend enough time with our portable/desktop electronic gadgets as it is, I think that having to converse to a "human robot" would be really, really depressing.
It's a bit ironic hey, that humans are constantly breaking new ground, discovering lots of things about the world and everything around them, yet the hardest thing to crack is ourselves.. :)
----
So Ariella wrote:
Justin wrote:
"If it is possible to effectively transplant our minds into another body, does that mean that our soul or spirit is also transplanted or even existed in the first place? I think this is what some people might have difficulty accepting. Or perhaps I've oversimplified the issue."
I don't think you have oversimplified the issue at all - I think it is just another way of asking the question that someone else asked this week of where the soul is located physically in our body. If we say the soul is a mental thing, then can it be transplanted like (potentially, but not now) the brain? My inclination (from the concept of emergence) would be to say no, that it can't... or that maybe part of your soul could be, but that there would be bits missing. But then, is your soul even your soul anymore if you were to start removing bits of it? Is the soul a whole, or is it too a sum of parts?
(I realise these questions are getting slightly off topic, sorry).
In response to Ariella's questions/reply to Justin's post, maybe the problem is that we are trying think of the soul and/or the spirit as being located somewhere physically within ourselves. Perhaps it's something more intangible, almost like a ghost, or one of those 'feelings' that you just have, the sense of a presence, that you just can't place a finger on.
I would also like to think that the soul and the spirit are things which cannot be transferred from one body to another.. and if the soul IS a sum of parts, then this sum is inseparable.. that is to say, there are so many things that make up the soul, it is impossible to try and "remove" something from it. I would be more inclined to believe that the soul is able to change, in the same way that a personality can change.
Phew! 10-12hr working days for two weeks.. has left me very far behind in tute discussions! Apologies for my ridiculously late replies.
Responding to Miroula's reponse to Ariella (;P), where she's mentioned "Perhaps being a paraplegic would lead the person to learn life lessons or become the kind of person they wouldnt have been able to become if they were able to walk."
I agree with Miroula on this. I've observed from news reports, or from reading about other people's lives/experiences, that when one part of the is damaged or is dysfunctional, another part of the brain seems to light up and become much more stronger or 'focused'.
Take for instance, the blind painter who is able to distinguish between colours simply by touching the dried pigment on the canvas (true story - Mum recently read about this dude in a Korean newspaper). His lack of eyesight appears to have heightened his sense of touch. It's as though the brain is provided with a certain amount of "skill", and depending on its influences, varying portions of "skill" are divided amongst the different functions.
To compare to something more basic, it's almost like those racing games, where you can choose to have a car with high speed but little grip, or good braking but slow acceleration.
----
In response to Alex's question "Will such a machine operate as a human brain does? Will it feel emotion, love, etc?" -
Call me stubborn but I think human emotion is possibly way too complex and unpredictable for us to break it down and "computerize" it, so to speak. Not only that, but it would make life so.. mechanic. We spend enough time with our portable/desktop electronic gadgets as it is, I think that having to converse to a "human robot" would be really, really depressing.
It's a bit ironic hey, that humans are constantly breaking new ground, discovering lots of things about the world and everything around them, yet the hardest thing to crack is ourselves.. :)
----
So Ariella wrote:
Justin wrote:
"If it is possible to effectively transplant our minds into another body, does that mean that our soul or spirit is also transplanted or even existed in the first place? I think this is what some people might have difficulty accepting. Or perhaps I've oversimplified the issue."
I don't think you have oversimplified the issue at all - I think it is just another way of asking the question that someone else asked this week of where the soul is located physically in our body. If we say the soul is a mental thing, then can it be transplanted like (potentially, but not now) the brain? My inclination (from the concept of emergence) would be to say no, that it can't... or that maybe part of your soul could be, but that there would be bits missing. But then, is your soul even your soul anymore if you were to start removing bits of it? Is the soul a whole, or is it too a sum of parts?
(I realise these questions are getting slightly off topic, sorry).
In response to Ariella's questions/reply to Justin's post, maybe the problem is that we are trying think of the soul and/or the spirit as being located somewhere physically within ourselves. Perhaps it's something more intangible, almost like a ghost, or one of those 'feelings' that you just have, the sense of a presence, that you just can't place a finger on.
I would also like to think that the soul and the spirit are things which cannot be transferred from one body to another.. and if the soul IS a sum of parts, then this sum is inseparable.. that is to say, there are so many things that make up the soul, it is impossible to try and "remove" something from it. I would be more inclined to believe that the soul is able to change, in the same way that a personality can change.
week 14 discussion posts #1-3
Slightly altered for the purposes of this blog
So Ashleigh wrote:
If you believe in them, what is your picture of heaven and hell? How did you get this picture?
I don’t know that I believe in them, but the image that I have of heaven and hell stems from storybooks from childhood and things I heard from others when younger. The classic white, bright and soft place above the earth for heaven and a fiery, hot and smoldering dungeon of a place for hell.
When it comes to my concept of Heaven & Hell, I'm much the same as Ashleigh - I'm influenced by childhood images and the media's representation of the pearly gates above and the pitchforks, horns and pointed tails beneath the earth.
I also like Stuart's idea of what lies beyond our current life on Earth. He wrote:
I do believe in there being something after death, and I guess in a way it is either heaven and hell, but tey are both the same. What I think is that when you die you will be surrounded by all that was important to you in life and everything you succeded in. Therefore, if you lived a good, fulfilling life, you will be much happier than the person who wasted their life and fell in to bad habits who would be surronded by a hellish environment.
- to be surrounded by all that was important to you throughout your years, it's a nice thought. That said, I personally have difficulty in believing that the 'afterlife' will be like that.
The more I think about it, the more I feel that it's not possible for there to be anything left for us after death - even if we were to transcend into a new dimension for the post-Earth way of life, doesn't that mean there must be trillions of now-dead people living in this alternate realm? So Victorians would converse with ancient Egyptians who in turn may converse with Bill Gates, and so on and so forth.. can you imagine the incompatibility and intense difficulty of communication these people would have, coming from different periods of time?
I feel that as the concept of time is a human creation, so is the concept of eternity. Neither are necessarily true; they are just a form of measurement, a yardstick of sorts..
-----
I'd have to agree (to an extent) with Ariella & Priyanka here, and say that the task of determining the 'one true idea' of the end of the universe is important if it leads to methods of prolonging the end.
That said, my thoughts are probably more absolute, in that I think it's a fairly pointless pursuit in any case, because if we DO manage to figure out which way the world will end, we're going to spend all our time trying to avoid it, and/or once the end arrives it's not like we'll still be here afterwards (in which case it *wasn't* the end, was it?) to say 'Yes, we were intelligent enough to accurately predict our own demise' or 'Damnit, we were wrong! If only we'd noticed [X] in the [nth] quadrant in the galaxy,' etc.
To respond to Larissa's question of "What is the aim of science anyway?", the pursuit of science, in my opinion, is to be able to explain things in logical/mathematical terms, that seems more reliable than 'Because God said so'. Of course another aspect of science is the ability to make educated 'guesses' or predictions based on the cumulative evidence, which is great for understanding how many years it will be before Antarctica disappears, but realistically anything could happen between now and next week that nobody could have ever predicted..
A bit of a dark post, but this is a rather dark topic of conversation methinks! :)
-----
Danielle, I agree with on your response to question two. I think the media focuses on the idea of "living in the present" and "do what you want, when you want".. the idea of respecting your elders, or saving for your future (i.e. house, family, etc) has taken a bit of a back seat in today's society, from my observations.
I remember when I was watching an afternoon kids' show back in primary school, they presented this 'wacky fact' that in 2050 or so, kids born around that time would live to 150 years on average. But considering today's 'typical' lifestyle of 'go hard' (huge generalisation I know), I'm not sure if that fact still holds..
So Ashleigh wrote:
If you believe in them, what is your picture of heaven and hell? How did you get this picture?
I don’t know that I believe in them, but the image that I have of heaven and hell stems from storybooks from childhood and things I heard from others when younger. The classic white, bright and soft place above the earth for heaven and a fiery, hot and smoldering dungeon of a place for hell.
When it comes to my concept of Heaven & Hell, I'm much the same as Ashleigh - I'm influenced by childhood images and the media's representation of the pearly gates above and the pitchforks, horns and pointed tails beneath the earth.
I also like Stuart's idea of what lies beyond our current life on Earth. He wrote:
I do believe in there being something after death, and I guess in a way it is either heaven and hell, but tey are both the same. What I think is that when you die you will be surrounded by all that was important to you in life and everything you succeded in. Therefore, if you lived a good, fulfilling life, you will be much happier than the person who wasted their life and fell in to bad habits who would be surronded by a hellish environment.
- to be surrounded by all that was important to you throughout your years, it's a nice thought. That said, I personally have difficulty in believing that the 'afterlife' will be like that.
The more I think about it, the more I feel that it's not possible for there to be anything left for us after death - even if we were to transcend into a new dimension for the post-Earth way of life, doesn't that mean there must be trillions of now-dead people living in this alternate realm? So Victorians would converse with ancient Egyptians who in turn may converse with Bill Gates, and so on and so forth.. can you imagine the incompatibility and intense difficulty of communication these people would have, coming from different periods of time?
I feel that as the concept of time is a human creation, so is the concept of eternity. Neither are necessarily true; they are just a form of measurement, a yardstick of sorts..
-----
I'd have to agree (to an extent) with Ariella & Priyanka here, and say that the task of determining the 'one true idea' of the end of the universe is important if it leads to methods of prolonging the end.
That said, my thoughts are probably more absolute, in that I think it's a fairly pointless pursuit in any case, because if we DO manage to figure out which way the world will end, we're going to spend all our time trying to avoid it, and/or once the end arrives it's not like we'll still be here afterwards (in which case it *wasn't* the end, was it?) to say 'Yes, we were intelligent enough to accurately predict our own demise' or 'Damnit, we were wrong! If only we'd noticed [X] in the [nth] quadrant in the galaxy,' etc.
To respond to Larissa's question of "What is the aim of science anyway?", the pursuit of science, in my opinion, is to be able to explain things in logical/mathematical terms, that seems more reliable than 'Because God said so'. Of course another aspect of science is the ability to make educated 'guesses' or predictions based on the cumulative evidence, which is great for understanding how many years it will be before Antarctica disappears, but realistically anything could happen between now and next week that nobody could have ever predicted..
A bit of a dark post, but this is a rather dark topic of conversation methinks! :)
-----
Danielle, I agree with on your response to question two. I think the media focuses on the idea of "living in the present" and "do what you want, when you want".. the idea of respecting your elders, or saving for your future (i.e. house, family, etc) has taken a bit of a back seat in today's society, from my observations.
I remember when I was watching an afternoon kids' show back in primary school, they presented this 'wacky fact' that in 2050 or so, kids born around that time would live to 150 years on average. But considering today's 'typical' lifestyle of 'go hard' (huge generalisation I know), I'm not sure if that fact still holds..
Tuesday, October 30, 2007
literally feeling your pain
It's not even my load.
but my heart doesn't know what to do with itself.
it's this bizarre mixture of sorrow and anger,
a frustration at not being able to help,
not being able to rant, or yell at anybody.
It's not my load
but it's still hurting me, getting me down
I don't like being depressed.
nobody should have to deal with shit like yours.
but my heart doesn't know what to do with itself.
it's this bizarre mixture of sorrow and anger,
a frustration at not being able to help,
not being able to rant, or yell at anybody.
It's not my load
but it's still hurting me, getting me down
I don't like being depressed.
nobody should have to deal with shit like yours.
Saturday, October 27, 2007
something old, something new
It's funny how things can be different because they stay the same.
Paradoxical comment I know, but if you know me, you probably know by now that I like to be confusing (and to be confused) sometimes.
What makes me say this is the album I'm currently listening to, which is John Legend's Once Again. I remember hearing it for the first time, and I was rather disappointed and unimpressed by the songs, because it was so different to his debut Get Lifted; it seemed more mainstream and chillaxed, and.. well, just different. And I, being the stubborn mule that I (occasionally) am, didn't really like the new sound he was coming up with.
It's been at least a year now since he released his second album, and having just watched the music video for "Save Room" on a friend's Facebook profile, and not to mention listening to the album in the car last night, I'm really enjoying the songs right now. I think they're absolutely fantastic!
I can't believe it's taken me this long to see the light and hear the music.
----------------
Now playing: John Legend - Again
Paradoxical comment I know, but if you know me, you probably know by now that I like to be confusing (and to be confused) sometimes.
What makes me say this is the album I'm currently listening to, which is John Legend's Once Again. I remember hearing it for the first time, and I was rather disappointed and unimpressed by the songs, because it was so different to his debut Get Lifted; it seemed more mainstream and chillaxed, and.. well, just different. And I, being the stubborn mule that I (occasionally) am, didn't really like the new sound he was coming up with.
It's been at least a year now since he released his second album, and having just watched the music video for "Save Room" on a friend's Facebook profile, and not to mention listening to the album in the car last night, I'm really enjoying the songs right now. I think they're absolutely fantastic!
I can't believe it's taken me this long to see the light and hear the music.
----------------
Now playing: John Legend - Again
john legend makes me fall in love
he loves her.
he calls every night,
and she falls asleep to the gentle rhythm of his voice.
she gets grumpy
because he's having fun in town
while she has to hit the books and study,
cooped up at home.
she gets upset because he doesn't call
she makes him stay up to chat even when he's tired
he does it for love.
she picks fights
uses words she shouldn't
when really, he's done no wrong.
he takes the blame,
takes the pain,
but his love is still the same.
she cries
to apologise
she is thankful
he loves her.
sometimes,
the time he spends driving to see her
is longer than the time they share together.
that's how you know
he loves her.
----------------
Now playing: John Legend - Stereo
he calls every night,
and she falls asleep to the gentle rhythm of his voice.
she gets grumpy
because he's having fun in town
while she has to hit the books and study,
cooped up at home.
she gets upset because he doesn't call
she makes him stay up to chat even when he's tired
he does it for love.
she picks fights
uses words she shouldn't
when really, he's done no wrong.
he takes the blame,
takes the pain,
but his love is still the same.
she cries
to apologise
she is thankful
he loves her.
sometimes,
the time he spends driving to see her
is longer than the time they share together.
that's how you know
he loves her.
----------------
Now playing: John Legend - Stereo
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